It's not often I attempt trying to tackle mental health. I have one, possibly two posts on the subject. However, my "method" of tackling mental health may be a little bit different. I'm not here to discuss the correct method for going over your own mental health. I want to talk to the people on the outside looking in. Those with loved ones struggling. I'm not going to tell you to check your loved ones into therapy or if you listen to their problems it will cure what they might be feeling. My personal safe haven and outlet lies on the internet, so along with carrying my own demons I've met a slew of people harboring and hiding away their own. Over the last few days I've been working out a more proper way for myself to understand mental health. During this process I came up with Assurance, Affirmation, Acceptance, and Attitude.
Assurance is actually one of my favorite words. Not necessary to the post itself, but I do want it to formally be recorded somewhere for my own selfish gains. Assurance is a declaration. It lets people know whatever they are feeling is an acceptable feeling. They are allowed to be scared and hurting, it doesn't make them any worse of a person for having or holding onto negative thoughts. The assurance is necessary because those affected tend to have a massive fear of there mental mental health issues being a burden to those around them. In my personal opinion people are beautiful and its near impossible for them to be a burden. Assure your love one it will be okay. It might not be at this time, but the now is only temporary.
Affirmation, emotional support or encouragement. When someone is in a struggling state of mind they aren't able to hear everything going on around them, try as they might. Even with all the wonderful advice or good tidings they are wished. They often struggle to be aware of all the good people around them, accidentally distancing themselves in the process. It's our job to let these people know we don't quite understand right now and its difficult to accept not understanding. However, it's not as simple as now allowing ourselves to understanding. We need to learn to attempt to understand exactly how we can support them. As their situations develop we will be able to work and move forward with them.
Acceptance, your loved one isn't okay, which is okay. A handful of people tend to complain about the mental health issues in their respective countries and how the government needs to take a step in the right direction to "cure" the issue. I find these people stupid. Let me specify by saying they aren't stupid for following in their ideals, they are stupid for opting so heavily for a solution. A "solution" or a "cure" involving spending copious amounts of money isn't correct. Twenty years ago mental health was a joke, one hundred years ago it wasn't mentioned, and a thousand years ago the thought didn't exist. Part of living in a progressive society is understanding the time it takes for these issues to be worked through. If our loved ones are affected, we don't need to sit by idly and wait for a cure. We need to accept what they are going through and support them in their time of need. It's incorrect to pump them full of medicine or send them in the direction of the first and cheapest therapist you can find. We need to work with them through the long arduous process, and find out what is correct for them.
Attitude, the scariest and the hardest of the "A's" to work through correctly. Having the correct attitude towards someone struggling with mental health issues is incredibly fucking difficult. An idea which isn't shared as often, is how hard and stressful the experience will be on you as well. You need to allow yourself to be exhausted, upset, and generally pissed off. All you are trying to do is support this person and work with them even if they can't see it. Frustration sets in sooner rather than later and you have to keep yourself from lashing out. The "correct" attitude is difficult to obtain, because each person will deal with their mental stability differently. However, what does end up being correct is allowing yourself to hurt just as often. Allowing yourself to take the deep breaths and the breaks from supporting your loved one. When they do come out better on the other side, I can promise the right people will be eternally grateful.
Remember your AAAA and WashYourAss
- Noble
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